File Under: TMI

You know, Too Much Information. About me. Things you don't really want to know. But here it is: Asparagus Pee. AP. Which now means that every time you read a news article by the Associated Press (AP), you're going to giggle.

But seriously people. I had asparagus for lunch the other day - I'm talking about 7 or 8 stalks of it. Immediately thereafter, my pee reeked of the stuff. I've cut up ONE stalk of asparagus and put it into an omelet before. Result: Immediate AP.

WHY??? Well friends, let's explore. Seems to me that no one can agree, but here's what some reputable (read: Wikipedia) sources had to say.

Wikipedia. Source of useless knowledge. Trusted resource for college students. On their asparagus page, Wiki actually has an entire section dedicated to Urine.

Certain compounds in asparagus are metabolized giving urine a distinctive smell due to various sulfur-containing degradation products, including various thiols, thioesters, and ammonia.[22]

The volatile organic compounds responsible for the smell are identified as:[23][24]
methanethiol,
dimethyl sulfide,
dimethyl disulfide,
bis(methylthio)methane,
dimethyl sulfoxide, and
dimethyl sulfone.

Subjectively, the first two are the most pungent, while the last two (sulfur-oxidized) give a sweet aroma. A mixture of these compounds form a "reconstituted asparagus urine" odor.

This was first investigated in 1891 by Marceli Nencki, who attributed the smell to methanethiol.[25]

Favorite Wiki quote: Marcel Proust claimed that asparagus "...transforms my chamber-pot into a flask of perfume."[21]

Discovery Channel (via). How I spend many of my lazy Saturdays or Sundays. They also had (have?) an awesome store which was likely the cause of much anxiety for my poor mother who had to drag us there when she wanted to find stuff for her classroom. They have toy dinosaurs and lots of books about farting and pooping and insects.

In 1891 a scientist named "Nencki" had so very little to do that he convinced four guys to eat seven kilograms of asparagus (that's about three and a half pounds each). He collected the pertinent pee, worked some medieval magic on it, and concluded that the smell was due to a metabolite called methanethiol....In 1975 a chemist from California claimed in Science that gas chromatography had fingered a different culprit: S-Methyl Thioesters, to be precise....Then there's the 1980 reference in the British Medical Journal that simply refers to "metabolites." Another asparagus scholar favors "six sulfur-containing compounds."

And last, but certainly not least, Chow.com. Seriously? Chow? But I digress. Tagline: "Food Drink Fun." Reputation: I have absolutely no clue. But they seem to have an opinion on asparagus.

This question has baffled scientists for over half a century. In 1956, British researchers divided the population into two categories: excretors . . . and nonexcretors.

Well there you have it ladies and gentlemen! Chow.com has spoken!

So here's what I learned: no one knows! And Wikipedia is the only one of the not-knowing sources that spoke with any conviction or authority about what it doesn't know. But I already knew both of those things. And to be quite honest, I don't really care which chemical makes my pee smell like a cocktail of toxic farm pesticides.

But all is not lost. I did learn one really interesting fact that I will gleefully carry with me until the end of days: In the name of science, a group of people got together TO SMELL OTHER PEOPLE'S ASPARAGUS PEE. The results? Not everyone has the ability to smell asparagus pee. HA! You thought you didn't get AP, but you might be an asparagus pee-er and have no clue! But wait - It gets better!!! You'll never know unless you ask someone else to smell your pee!

I'm so easily amused.